I had such a bizarre dream last night. I was going through a library that had books which were alive. I was the book master or some fucking shit. I was going through these books and they were all talking at me or moving or opening by themselves. I looked up the dream and it said that to dream of books/library it means that I am looking for or already have gained knowledge. eh, I say it was a fucky dream.
Last night I was just thinking to myself, "would I be more outgoing if I thought I was sexier?"
I dont know but I really kind of think that men wouldn't mind getting married to someone who is skinny.
garf!!!! So today I need to weigh in. And I need to mentally prepare myself for what is coming. I may have gained, however I feel as if I haven't. I feel lighter. I look at my hands and they suggest I haven't gained either.
so i know i wrote yesterday that i cheated and today i will start fresh. i cheat eat for a reason called stress i believe. well last night was different i was feeling starved. I need to get those yam noodles those helped me a lot when i was doing this. duh, should'a known. ha h ahhahahha. any way here i go to weigh in :(
um.... i have actually lost weight. WHAT THE FUCKEN HEEEEEELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL
i went from 197.7 to losing .7 lbs on an extra load day. oh man.
i am just going to say my goal weight is 180 because i dont think i am really getting to 153.
i fear i may be getting too used to hcg. im going to see where this hcg takes me in one week.
like i did last time.
right now i feel hungry and i feel ok. i am not complaining about being 197. i am surprised. very surprised. i was expecting a weight gain not loss. i need to read back on this one lady who did hcg and still lost when she ate what ever she wanted to.
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